


tastes like peppermint

by aalphard



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Awkward Romance, Best Friends to Lovers, First Kiss, Fluff, Getting Together, Kozume Kenma is Bad at Feelings, Literal Sleeping Together, M/M, Not Beta Read, Pillow Talk, Platonic Cuddling, Sleeping Together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-08
Updated: 2020-05-08
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:07:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,389
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24078712
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aalphard/pseuds/aalphard
Summary: He steals a glance at his alarm clock on the nightstand and turns to look at his bedroom door. It’s routine by now. Every night, Kenma shows up in his bedroom, clutching the duvet wrapped around his shoulder, calling out Kuroo’s name in a whisper. Every night at 3 AM they curl their bodies against each other and Kuroo plays with his hair until he falls asleep in his arms, clutching at his shirts and mumbling nonsense in his sleep. Kuroo always wonders if Kenma ever dreams about him.“Kuro?” He hears and sits up almost immediately. He sees Kenma’s silhouette against the light that’s coming from the corridor and despite seeing this every night, Kuroo can’t help but think it’s a beautiful sight – a sight he would never get tired of seeing.“Come here,” he says back, opening his arms.or: they’ve been friends for so long kuroo already knows kenma’s sleeping pattern and isn’t the least concerned when he shows up for cuddles in the middle of the night.
Relationships: Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou
Comments: 20
Kudos: 386





	tastes like peppermint

**Author's Note:**

> based on this prompt:
>
>> we’re roommates and you always ‘sleepwalk’ into my room and get in my bed and cuddle at four am

They were best friends – there was no doubt about that. Ever since they were kids, Kenma was there and Kuroo thought he would be the only constant thing in his life. It didn’t come as a surprise when they decided to share an apartment when they graduated high school – it wasn’t like they hadn’t thought about it before, and it’s not like it would come as a surprise to anyone, anyway. And it was fun, living with your best friend. You didn’t have to be careful about what you would say and you didn’t have to worry about walking around in your underwear after you woke up because _well, it’s not like they hadn’t seen each other naked already._ And it wasn’t weird, sharing an apartment and chores and cuddling on the couch while watching crappy TV at ridiculous hours at night. It felt nice – and it felt _familiar_ , because they were always doing that. The only difference was that now they had less people around, now it was just the two of them – and that might have made Kuroo think about stuff he wasn’t really _supposed_ to think.

They were best friends, and as much as Kuroo wanted them to be _more_ , he couldn’t bring himself to say it. It’s not like Kenma was interested in anything other than videogames, anyway. He had never _once_ talked about someone, never _once_ talked about first kisses or first times and Kuroo couldn’t bring himself to ask that. _Who was his first kiss? Did he already have sex?_ And it felt weird thinking about those things but he was just so _curious_. But the day would eventually come when Kenma would find someone else and come up to him to say he was moving out and Kuroo wanted to prepare for it.

The sole purpose of their moving in together was that, even if Kenma didn’t really _want_ to go to college, Kuroo would still be with him. They wouldn’t lose touch as it usually happened with childhood best friends, because Kuroo didn’t want that to happen. People usually thought Kenma depended too much on him, but he thought it was quite the opposite – _he_ was the one who depended on Kenma, who needed him close all the time. That’s what made him drag the poor boy into volleyball in the first place. That’s what made him ask for them to move in together. That’s what got him to fall in love with him. And he loved and hated it – because he could never be truly honest with Kenma about his feelings, not if he wanted things to stay as they always had been.

His head always replays the same scenarios late at night, when he can’t sleep, wrapped up in his blankets and staring up at his ceiling. He doesn’t like to sleep with lights on, so he doesn’t really see anything besides the dark, and somehow that makes it easier for him to think. It’s not like he doesn’t _want_ to tell Kenma how he feels. It’s not like he doesn’t imagine what it would be like to hold him _knowing_ he was _his_ , knowing it was different, somehow. It’s not like he doesn’t imagine what Kenma would taste like if he were ever to slouch down a bit to kiss him while they played something Kenma would excitedly tell him about. But it’s not like he could _easily_ do any of that, anyway. He couldn’t risk it.

He steals a glance at his alarm clock on the nightstand and turns to look at his bedroom door. It’s routine by now. Every night, Kenma shows up in his bedroom, clutching the duvet wrapped around his shoulder, calling out Kuroo’s name in a whisper. Every night at 3 AM they curl their bodies against each other and Kuroo plays with his hair until he falls asleep in his arms, clutching at his shirts and mumbling nonsense in his sleep. Kuroo always wonders if Kenma ever dreams about him.

“Kuro?” He hears and sits up almost immediately. He sees Kenma’s silhouette against the light that’s coming from the corridor and despite seeing this _every night,_ Kuroo can’t help but think it’s a beautiful sight – a sight he would never get tired of seeing.

“Come here,” he says back, opening his arms.

Kenma tiptoes around the room, letting his duvet fall to the floor as he climbs onto Kuroo’s bed, getting under his covers, letting himself be wrapped up in strong arms. He clutches the cloth of Kuroo’s pajamas, inhaling deeply before sighing loudly. Kuroo dips his hand into his hair and rests his chin on his head. _He smells so nice_ , is what he thinks. It’s about security, he thinks. They used to cuddle a lot ever since they were kids and that kind of became a habit – and he loved it. He loved the way their bodies felt against each other, the way Kenma fit _perfectly_ in his arms, as if they were _made_ to do that, the way he wrapped himself on Kuroo when he fell asleep, the way he looked up at him when they woke up the next day. It wasn’t weird. It was _them_.

“I couldn’t sleep,” he says. Kuroo knows. “It felt weird, too cold.”

Kuroo knows Kenma has trouble sleeping. He knows everything there is to know about him. He knows how he likes his eggs in the morning, he knows when he’s upset because he lost in a game, he knows when he needs cuddles and when he’s tired. He knows how to tell if he’s happy or upset and he knows what to do when he’s sad. But he doesn’t say it. He never says it – because he doesn’t want to make things _weird_. And it’s funny to think about it because he’s so _straightforward_ with other people, he can say anything he wants to and he doesn’t even _care_. But Kenma makes him a pussy and he can’t bring himself to say anything.

“Do you mind if I stay here for a while?” Kenma asks again, as if he still doesn’t know the answer. They’ve been cuddling like this ever since they moved in, when their heating system wasn’t really working as it should be, so they decided it would be best to share a bed until it got fixed. But when it did, Kenma still came around every night as if it wasn’t enough.

“You’re always welcome,” he answers as he does every night, and Kenma snuggles up to him.

For a moment, he feels wrong. It’s like this every single time. He holds Kenma, he dips his hands in his hair and he lets him snuggle with him, lets him nuzzle him, lets him breathe softly against his chest until he’s asleep, completely oblivious to Kuroo’s feelings and he feels like he might be taking advantage of him. But when Kenma almost _purrs_ , he forgets about it.

He knows Kenma can hear his heartbeat and he knows he has to control himself, but sometimes it’s easier said than done. Kuroo is actually glad Kenma is so oblivious, so _bad_ at catching hints, so bad at _feelings_ , because then he doesn’t have to worry about being found out when his heart misses a bit or when it beats a little bit faster than normal just because Kenma curled up against him a little more, because he _purred_ , because he’s just _there_ and his presence alone is enough to make Kuroo lose composure.

“Kuroo?” He calls out in a whisper, hiding his face on Kuroo’s chest. It’s not like he would have been able to _see_ him, either way. He hums, and Kenma tugs at his shirt a little harder. “Do you hate it?”

All of a sudden, Kuroo swears his heart stopped for a second there. “What do you mean?”

“This,” he huffs and Kuroo is sure he’s on the verge of tears and he’s _so confused_. “ _Me_ coming to your bed every night and making you cuddle when you’re so tired already.”

“Kenma…”

“I can hear your heart, you know?”

He’s definitely going to die – and Kozume Kenma would be the cause of death. His breath hitched and he tries to chuckle, tries to brush it off somehow. He holds Kenma’s head a bit closer to his chest, curling up against him and resting his chin on the top of his head. _Of course he would think something was wrong_ , he thinks. _He might be bad at understanding emotions, but he’s not an idiot. I am, though_.

“I know,” Kuroo answers, sighing. “I don’t hate it,” he says, and he feels Kenma relaxing under his touch. _Oh, so he was_ tense _because of this._ “I don’t hate it at all. I love knowing you still need me.”

“I will always need you, Kuro” Kenma whispers. Kuroo thinks he’s been shot because _there’s no way his heart is hurting_ this _bad without having something piercing it_.

And they just stay like that for a while and it feels nice, it feels safe and it feels like home. Kuroo hadn’t really thought about it before, how Kenma’s breath hitched when he drew circles with the tips of his fingers on his back or when his fingers brushed his nape while he played with his hair. But suddenly he was paying attention to it, and his little yelps were the most adorable thing Kuroo had ever heard. What else didn’t he know? What else was there for someone else to discover? He hated to admit it, but the thought of someone else touching Kenma like that, knowing things he never would… it made something sludgy and horrid churn in his stomach and he feels _horrible_ all of a sudden.

Kenma only snuggles up closer and closer and he wraps his arms around him a little bit tighter, wanting to keep him there forever. It’s _stupid_ , the way Kenma makes him feel so desperate, so out of control, so _possessive_ when he didn’t even have the right to. It made him feel sick but he didn’t know how to change it, how to make that horrid feeling that burnt his gut go away. It’s _stupid_ , loving someone so hard you can’t help but feel the _need_ to have them this close all the time. Kuroo feels like he's going crazy.

They never talk much during their nightly cuddling sessions. Maybe because they’re tired, maybe because there’s not much to talk about when they see each other all the time, more than they did before. Or maybe because Kuroo doesn’t want to risk saying something he shouldn’t and Kenma just doesn’t really care. And it’s _fine_ , Kuroo tells himself. It feels familiar and Kuroo wouldn’t want it to end just because he got his stupid feelings mixed up in it.

“How’s college?” Kenma asks all of a sudden.

“It’s okay, I guess,” he answers, holding him a little closer, inhaling the _oh-so-familiar_ smell of Kenma’s shampoo. “I miss playing with you, though.”

Kenma snorts and Kuroo allows a chuckle to escape his throat, “I bet you do.”

He hums, stroking his hair and then Kenma throws his arm around his waist, dipping his head further into his chest and he can’t help but feel something churn in his stomach in anticipation of something that he _knew_ would never come. _I’m so stupid_ , he thinks. _As if anything would ever happen_ , he thinks. _He’ll meet new people from now on and I’ll have to move on_ , he thinks. But he doesn’t _want_ to. He wants them to be like this forever – and he _knows_ it’s a pipe dream, he knows they’ll eventually drift apart and it _hurts_ , it hurts so much sometimes he thinks he’s going to die.

Kenma, on the other hand, feels as safe as always. There _was_ , in fact, something new happening, and he doesn't really know how to describe it – a wheel inside his heart, something he had never noticed before, and it was spinning so fast it made him dizzy sometimes. It spun and spun and whenever Kuroo looked down at him with that sweet smile of his, Kenma thought he was going to die. He wondered if that strange, sweet pain, was something people called _love_ , because there was nothing else he could think of.

It’s not like he didn’t _read_ and did anything besides playing videogames, and of course he had heard people talking about what it felt like, being in love. But he had never experienced it, had never _longed_ for someone else – and he thought the tingle in his tummy whenever Kuroo was around was only because they were best friends, because he liked him and that was it. It had never, not even _once_ , crossed his mind that he was in love. He decided, then, that love was a strange thing – you could be perfectly fine and in the next minute you were falling at its feet. A scary thing, _love_.

“Kuro?” He whispers. “Are you still awake?”

There’s a minute of silence, and then he listens to him yawning. “Yeah,” he mumbles out. “What’s up?”

“Nothing, I just wanted to hear your voice.”

He listens to the intake of air and the sudden thumping on Kuroo’s chest, a lot faster and harder than it was before, and he can’t help the smile tugging his lips up. It was always fun messing with him like that. He likes it when Kuroo holds him close, he likes dipping his head onto his chest and he likes to nuzzle him, snuggling closer and closer and _feeling_ him. Kuroo smells… _warm_. That’s the best he can think of – he smells like _home_ , somehow.

“You can’t just _say_ things like that,” he whines and Kenma can’t help but snort. “It’s so unfair!”

“Why?” He looks up and catches Kuroo’s eyes. He hadn’t closed the door when he came in, and the light from the hallway came creeping up – and he was glad he forgot to close it, because he got to see Kuroo’s eyes gleaming with _something_. “It’s fun.”

Kuroo doesn't answer. He's looking at him, mouth slightly open and brows furrowed – he seems to be thinking hard about something and, for the first time, Kenma has no idea what that was about. He can't tell what Kuroo is thinking and it suddenly makes him feel uneasy, like he's being brushed off, put aside. It makes something twist almost painfully inside of him and he suddenly feels like crying.

He starts to wonder _how would Kuroo react if I were to confess right now? Would he throw me out? Would he cry? Will we ever be the same? Does he have someone he’s in love with? He met so many people already. I wonder if he ever liked me. Do I really love him, though? What_ is _this thing I’m feeling? Why is my heart hurting every time he talks about someone new? I wonder when he’ll start dating and bringing said person home. Will I have to leave? Will he make me leave? What if they don’t like me? What if they make Kuroo hate me? What will I do?!_

“Is everything alright?” Kuroo asks, his voice so _sweet_ Kenma feels tears pooling up in his eyes.

“Kuro,” he breathes out. “Do you have someone you like?”

It feels like the world is coming down over his head – and suddenly Kuroo can't breathe. Has he been found out? What is he going to say? Is _that_ how his confession is happening? As an apology? _Should he apologize?_

“Uh,” he stutters. “W-what?”

“I mean,” Kenma sniffs, and Kuroo’s heart breaks in a thousand pieces. “You’ve met so many new people, right? I was just wondering if you’d met someone and taken a liking to them, _s’all_.”

Kuroo looks down at him and thanks to the light coming from the hallway, he can see Kenma pouting a bit, cheeks a little bit darker than they used to be and he can’t help his own smile. Is he _embarrassed?_ What was up with that question all of a sudden?

“You don’t have to answer it if you don’t want to,” he says, tripping over his words. “It was a weird question, I was just… _curious_.”

“Why?” Kuroo asks, reaching for Kenma’s chin and holding his head up so they are looking at each other. He raises an eyebrow, still looking into Kenma’s eyes. “Do _you_ have someone you like?”

He's trying to play it cool, trying to brace himself for the moment Kenma said _yeah, I do_ , for the moment Kenma asks him what he should do, when they should go for their next date, what he should wear and all that crap. He's trying to prepare himself for the day he would help Kenma pack his things, for the day he’d have to see him off, for the day he’d go visit them in their new home and it _hurt_. But Kuroo is a very good actor, keeping up the façade and even managing a smirk when Kenma widens his eyes in surprise.

“Y-yeah,” he mumbles out, finally, and Kuroo has to give everything he has to keep up the act, to pretend he’s not _utterly destroyed_. _Of course he would like someone eventually!_ “Did you already know?”

Kuroo wants to say he did. He wants to play along and tell him _of course, I know everything about you._ But the words don’t make sense in his head and he doesn’t think he’s strong enough to actually say it, he doesn’t think he can muster up the strength to move a single muscle in his body. Kenma is blinking up at him and there are tears in his eyes and Kuroo feels himself _in pain_ because they would never be _more_ than childhood best friends and one day he wouldn’t be able to hold Kenma like that, wouldn’t be able to feel him curling up to him, calling out to him from the other room and wouldn’t be able to see him smile lazily as soon as he woke up anymore. It _hurts_ and he _hates_ it.

“I’m _sorry,”_ Kenma sobs – and that’s what brings Kuroo out of his thoughts.

“Wha–” he starts off. “ _Why?”_

It’s not like he _knows_ , right? He shouldn’t feel bad for liking someone else when he didn’t know Kuroo liked _him_. He was free and Kuroo was glad he found someone to love and he could only hope they’d be so, _so happy_ and–

“It’s weird, right?” He closes his eyes as another sob breaks through his throat. “You’re going to hate me but I can’t help it, I can’t and I tried so hard… but in the end it didn’t make a difference because you’re all I can think of and…”

_Hold on._

“… I feel like I’m going crazy and I don’t know what I’m feeling but _it hurts_ …”

_Wait a second._

“… and I’m _so sorry_ , I tried and tried but I can’t _stop this_ …”

_Was he dreaming, by any chance?_

“Kuro, I’m so _sorry,_ ” he sniffs, and then he’s _crying_ and Kuroo doesn’t know what to do for a second. Does he say it back? _How_ does he say it back? Will he think he’s making fun of him? Will he start crying harder? Kuroo _doesn’t know_ and his head is spinning and he’s dizzy. “ _I’m so, so sorry._ I truly am. But I think I love you and I can’t stop it, I _can’t_ , and it hurts _so much_.”

“I know,” he whispers, wrapping his arms around him and holding him _close, close, close, so, so close_. Kenma sobs, holding on tightly to his shirt, not even caring anymore, it just _hurts and Kuroo doesn’t know anything, how would_ he _know, when he was like that and everyone just_ naturally _liked him and he could get anyone he wanted and it_ hurt.

“You _don’t_ , how can you know?” He says in-between sobs and whines and Kuroo feels his heart breaking.

Kenma has his eyes shut, and it hurts so much he feels like he’s going to die. He said it – so _why didn’t the wheel stop?_ Why is it that there’s still that _tingling_ in his tummy, why is it that his heart feels like it’s going to burst at any second now? _Why does it hurt so much?_

“Kenma,” Kuroo calls him but he doesn’t want to look up, doesn’t want to look at him because it _hurts_ and he _knows_ it’s weird and he didn’t _want to_ but he’s feeling that and he doesn’t like it because it’s ruining everything they had up to that point and he’s _so sad_ and everything is _terrible_ and he suddenly remembers he has to call home and ask his parents if he can move in again because he can no longer live with Kuroo and _fuck, it hurts so bad._ “Kenma, _look_ at me. _Look at me_.”

He doesn’t _want_ to, doesn’t want to, but he _does_ anyway because it’s Kuroo and he _loves him so much_ and he just called up to him in such a _sweet_ tone and he’s looking down at him with the sweetest smile plastered on his face, with eyes gleaming even in the dark and Kenma is so _hopelessly in love_ and he’s already bracing himself for Kuroo’s next words, for the way he’s going to be so gentle while telling him to move out, while telling him he’s weird and he doesn’t want to have anything to do with him anymore and it seems _stupid_ , what he’s thinking of, but it’s the only thing he _can_ think of because there’s _no way_ Kuroo feels anything for _him_ – the _weird_ , lanky kid who was always gripping at the hems of his shirts, getting pulled along everywhere and obliging to anything he said because _maybe he has always loved him and just didn’t know_.

“Why are you crying?” He asks so tenderly Kenma can’t help but choke out a sob.

“ _Hurts,”_ he whines. “Hurts so bad and I don’t know how to stop it.”

Kuroo nods. “I know, I know,” he shushes him, holding him a little bit closer, crouching down just so that their foreheads are touching and Kenma feels something churning in his tummy, something sliding up his throat and it’s _so unfair_. “Hey, Kenma?”

He can’t really see anything because of the tears and because he’s dizzy and Kuroo’s holding him _so tight_ and he can’t really understand what he’s thinking, what he’s _feeling_ anymore because he’s so _scared_ and he doesn’t want to hear what Kuroo says next, he doesn’t want to get thrown out and he feels _wrong_ , as if that was never supposed to happen and he can’t bear the thought that Kuroo might start hating him because of that, he just _can’t_.

“Can I kiss you?”

Time stops. _Everything stops_ and his tears are no longer falling, his breath suddenly halted and he’s sure even his heart stopped in its track for a second there. And then it all comes crashing down again, a million times worse than before, and he can’t help the sob that comes out, he can’t help the loud whine, the harsh and raspy words that follow, the _anger_ he feels deep in his stomach, that _sludgy and horrid feeling_ creeping up on him, melting his insides and making his head spin.

“ _How dare you,_ ” he spits out, untangling himself from Kuroo’s arms and looking at him with the most _hurt_ expression Kuroo has ever seen in his entire life. “How dare you make _fun_ of me like that, how dare you, _how dare you.”_

“Wha–!”

Kuroo doesn’t know what to say and suddenly Kenma is throwing light punches to his chest, keeping them away from each other, and he’s sobbing and crying and Kuroo doesn’t think he has even seen Kenma like that. _Making fun of him?_ Oh, _Kenma, don’t you know? I was yours since day one,_ he wants to say. But he doesn’t. Because Kenma won’t believe him, Kenma will just think he’s being sarcastic and trying to make fun of him somehow and he can’t even blame him. If Kenma wasn’t crying like that, he might have thought Kenma was making fun of him as well.

“I don’t know what I’m feeling and when I think I do, everything changes and it _hurts,_ ” he sobs. “And I tried to _stop it_ , I tried filling my head with something else, with _anything_ else but it all came down to _you_ and I can’t ever stop thinking about you and it _hurts so much_ and you’re here making _fun of me_ and that’s the _worst thing that has ever happened to me_.”

“Kenma…”

“ _Why are you doing this?”_ He throws one last punch, this time a little bit harder, and Kuroo loses his breath for a second. Kenma drops his arms, crouching and hiding his face in his hands, his whole body shaking. “ _Is it fun doing that?”_

“Kenma, look at me,” he pleads. “ _Please_ , look at me.”

When Kenma doesn’t move, Kuroo sighs, tilting his whole body forward and wrapping his arms around his body once more, hugging him tightly. He nuzzles close, holding him and thinking _when did he get so lucky?_

“I was so scared of the day you’d come up to me and tell me you found someone,” he says, almost in a whisper, and suddenly Kenma freezes under his arms.

“ _Don’t,”_ he sobs, but Kuroo only holds him tighter.

“And I was preparing myself for that,” he continues. “I was preparing for the day you’d come up to me with someone holding you and telling me you were moving out because you wanted to live with the person you loved and I was telling myself I had to be strong and give you up, see you off, because you’re my best friend and I want you to be happy.”

He looks down at Kenma, but he still hides his face in his hands – but he’s no longer crying.

“But I was also _dreading_ it. I hate myself for thinking that, but I didn’t want anyone else touching you like I touch you. I didn’t want anyone seeing parts of you I have yet to see, I didn’t want anyone to know you more than I do. I want you. I have always wanted you and it made me feel terrible whenever the thought of you with someone else found its way into my head. It made me feel sick.”

“ _Why,”_ Kenma whispers, still not looking up at Kuroo.

“Because I’m in love with you,” he says as if it’s nothing, as if it hadn’t eaten him alive for the last three years, as if it hadn’t made him lose sleep now and then, because the fear of losing everything they had was bigger than the _need_ to hold Kenma in his arms. “I have always loved you, I think.”

It’s only when Kenma looks up at him from behind his bangs that Kuroo feels his heart halt, and then take off at a fast pace, and he feels his throat closing in on itself and it’s suddenly _so hard to breathe_.

“Why didn’t you say anything if you’ve known for that long?” and he seems so _hurt_ , so _out of himself_ that Kuroo actually starts to feel guilty.

“ _Because,”_ he sighs, letting his head drop once more until their foreheads touch. He closes his eyes, suddenly embarrassed, and he’s well aware that Kenma is still staring up at him, even when their faces are so close. “I was afraid. I was scared you were going to hate me because you had never talked about those things, you only cared about your games and volleyball and I was _fine_ with that, I didn’t need anything _more_ , but then I started thinking about you going out with someone else and it made me feel _so jealous_. I just couldn’t tell you. You make me a coward.”

Kenma snorts, and then he giggles, and Kuroo opens his eyes to see the most beautiful thing to ever exist. He’s smiling through the trails of tears on his cheeks, eyes closed and nose slightly scrunched up and it’s _adorable_ and Kuroo is _so in love it hurts_.

“Kenma?” He calls again.

He opens his eyes and his smile starts to slowly fade from his face while a pink tint smears across his cheeks, across his whole face, and suddenly Kenma feels hot, tummy heating up in anticipation. He doesn’t need Kuroo to ask him again, he doesn’t need to give him permission because he’s already _his_ , always has been. But Kuroo asks anyway, Kuroo needs to make sure, needs to _know_ if this is something he wants, and Kenma thinks it’s a bit cute. “Can I kiss you?”

There is absolutely _no way_ for him to trust his own words, so he just nods, hoping Kuroo can see him properly in the dimly lit room. Thankfully, he does, and he’s cupping Kenma’s cheek, holding his head in place and Kenma closes his eyes, tummy heating up, his whole body burning and he’s so _nervous_ because he had never done this before – he was just _there_ all the time, listening to their friends talking about hook-ups, listening to _Kuroo_ talking about other people and he felt so _weird_ back then, listening to all that. It just seemed _gross_ , but now he wanted to feel what it was like, he _needed_ to feel Kuroo’s lips on him, wanted, _needed_ to know what Kuroo tasted like.

But Kuroo doesn’t kiss him right then. Kenma can feel his breath _so close_ and there are kisses being peppered along his whole face – under his eyes, on the tip of his nose, _so close_ to his lips, on his chin, and they dance along his jaw, but never going below, never brushing further down and _not where Kenma wants him to kiss_.

“You’re beautiful,” he whispers, kissing the tip of his nose once again, and Kenma shivers under his touch. _It’s too much_ , he thinks. _Kuroo is too much_.

And then, suddenly, there’s something _soft_ and so, _so warm_ , against his lips and Kenma can’t help but purr. _It feels nice_ , he thinks. Kuroo is still holding his face, dipping his fingers into his hair and pulling him _close, close, close, so close_ , and his heart starts to take off, thumping so loud he can feel it in his eardrums – and he’s afraid Kuroo can hear it too, but he can’t bring himself to care when Kuroo tilts his head to the side. _He knows what’s coming and it makes his stomach churn and he’s so excited but also so scared_. Instinctively, he lets his mouth hang open, and Kuroo is on him again, bringing his other hand to hold his neck, pulling him closer, closer, _closer_ , and there’s something _wet_ in his mouth and Kenma opens his eyes in surprise, not really knowing what to do. It feels _weird_.

But Kuroo hums and he closes his eyes once again, trying to memorize what he’s supposed to be doing. When Kuroo kisses him again, he tries to mimic what Kuroo just did and he hums against his lips once again – and there’s _something else_ building up in the pit of his stomach and he _likes it_. He lets Kuroo pull him closer, closer, closer, until they’re lying down and Kenma is sprawled out on top of him and Kuroo is touching him _everywhere_ and it’s _too much_ and he doesn’t care because it’s _good, so good._

“ _Kuro,_ ” he huffs when they break away. He’s smiling up at Kenma, eyes twinkling with excitement and his lips are puffy and red and Kenma wants to kiss him again. And a few more times after that.

“I love you,” Kuroo whispers, pulling him into a hug once again. “I love you, I love you.”

Kenma feels his heart flipping over, and there’s a cold feeling in his tummy, but it feels nice. It feels nice because Kuroo is peppering kisses all over his face again, letting their lips touch ever so slightly and Kenma is about to lose it. And when Kuroo _kisses_ him again, Kenma can only think that Kuroo tastes like peppermint.


End file.
